The year has ended.
It kinda has a surreal feeling when you think about how many plans you had and what high expectations you had at beginning of the year.
If you accomplished all you planned to do, then. Hurray!!!!!!!!!!!
You are among the 8% percent of people who actually achieve their new year resolutions according to forbes.
The rest of us got caught up in activities, or life happened and certain things had to give.
However, 2016 is a few days away and the question in your mind is how can you plan things and follow them through. In other words, how you can become an improved version of the person you were this year.
There are so many schools of thought as to how to go about this, but I want to highlight one crucial way I find most helpful.
Become a Better Person by Having a mind to learn.
This can come in various forms.
- Having mentors. For example, the Phenomenal Coach, John Obidi
- Having a support group (facebook groups like Victor Bassey’s HPEN, or the lovely Igbinoba Esohe’s fam)
- Attend seminars, webinars etc. These could be physical or online, in the comfort of your home.
- Attend networking sessions/conferences. In the past two weeks, I had the privilege of attending 2.
And I must say, I left with a burning desire to move from the “I can…” to “I will ..”and even “I have done…”.
Because I have a large heart, let me share some nuggets.
The first was the Lagos Mums event hosted by the lovely Yetty Williams with the theme, “What Are You Balancing?”
We had 4 amazing resource persons.
She highlighted the fact that women should be decisive about their finances and shouldn’t wait until life forces them to be financially responsible to do so.
The need to invest wisely was emphasized; in self, relationship, money and talent.
The craze to wear what the next person wears, send your children to the same schools, and all that should not be the priority of the wise woman.
“Give your children the quality education you can afford, not the one your neighbor can afford”
In her words, “the Joneses are broke, and they are trying to keep up with you”
“don’t spoil your children; do not give them experiences they have not earned”.
She’s a Personal Finance Expert & CEO of Bestman Games, Nimi Akinkugbe.
Her new book, A – Z of Personal Finance provides frank, practical insights to create a greater awareness and understanding of personal finance and wealth management issues.
Next up was Mrs Abolaji Osime.
Her passion for the children was easily palpable from her session.
She highlighted the fact that most times it’s the children that pay the price for the “busyness” of the mum. The children are left to bring themselves up or at best, nannies do that while we are out there looking for money.
My “takehome” from her session was that, life is in phases.
And so I must understand what phase I’m at, and do what best for my family and I at that particular time. Take time to enjoy the phase.
“the woman who tries to have everything in life, is the one that breaks down”
Slow down, momma.
In her words, what legacy are you building?
Children spell love, TIME.
Don’t get addicted to stress! Don’t try to be a super hero.
she also stressed how important it was that moms have a support system.
She’s the CEO & Founder of Global International College, a secondary and sixth form college with branches in Lagos and Abuja.
Watch this timeline for the exclusive interview with her.
Then came the Delectable Dakore.
She shared her personal story on how her journey into motherhood.
She talked about how she had to make adjustments and find a balance while juggling being a working mom in a passionate career and having time for her two beautiful daughters.
She emphasized that something had to give, but it doesn’t have to change who you are. Rather it could help you discover other aspects of your life that you had potential to do but hadn’t done.
In her words, … “be a great listener, listen to your child”
Gain power over your time; the hussle should not take away from your assignments as parents.
She pleaded with women to raise their sons right, and not make them feel superior to their female counterparts.
Her final words were,
“we carry so many burdens, let’s try and be kind an sensitive to the people around us”.
Isn’t that sweet?
Shes a multiple Award-winning actress, a performing artist, multibrand Ambassador, Producer, to name a few.
Oh, yes. And Mum to her warrior princesses.
Last but not least, came The Catalyst, Mr Lanre Olusola.
The only male in the line up of our resource persons and he did justice to his time there.
His opening statement was an eye-opener.
“Balance is an illusion; harmony however is attainable”
Harmony and alignment rather than balance are the keys to happiness, fulfillment and satisfaction in life.
He gave us chilling statistics about children, the new average age of sexual activity in children, (which is 6, by the way) and how much mums stand to lose if they neglect the home.
We had a demonstration using the wheel of life, and it was funny to see how we really felt about the various aspects of our life.
Basically, we are not ok. We all are dysfunctional. Pun intended.
Hmmmm. (I’m ok in Jesus name, lol)
In his words,
“you are not your child’s friend. But friendship is a tool you should use in relating with your child.”
Use every opportunity to boost your child’s self esteem, don’t compare one with another.
In raising balanced children, he had this to say, “develop leadership in your children. When they are leaders, they will never be followers”.
He stressed the need to AFFIRM our children.
He also had some stern words for us.
”There’s no society that can withstand women that stand together. Stop the bickering! Women, support each other.”
He’s one of Africa’s leading Life, Mind, Emotions and Behavioural Change Coaches. has worked with several individuals, organisations and government agencies including the World Bank, The Nigerian Stock Exchange and leading banks in Nigeria.
you can find him here and take his personality test. or follow him on twitter @lanreolusola
What else can i say?
It was simply ACCA-awesome, like the Pitch Perfect fans would say.
I left there feeling better equipped to become a better parent and with the opportunity to network there, i definitely increased my networth.
You know the saying, your network is your networth.
LagosMums is a destination and resource for parents navigating the parenting journey in the 21st century anywhere, not just in Lagos.
you can also get information and resources applicable to women here in Lagos – e.g. discuss issues like how to hire nannies, family friendly events. Schools in your neighbourhood and so much more.
So, friends, you see why i just couldn’t keep this to myself. I left there a better person, inspired and motivated.
Feel free to share this. You never know who would thank you for this.
In what ways do you plan to improve yourself in the coming year? I’d be glad to hear it in the comments.